Tuesday 20 January 2015

As you know, we don't do humour...

Unless it is relevant to review management. In this case, we feel it is justified. Regular readers will remember Botto Bistro from back in October last year. Well, this is an update.

Bottos now have a newsletter. For those of you with five minutes to burn here it is in full (more on their website; this from their FAQ's: 'Q: 'What does your food come with?' A: 'It comes with a plate' - you get the gist). Bottos hate Yelp so much they are fighting back the only way they know how - by actively inviting one star reviews (to the extent of offering a 50% discount as a reward). Is it working? You be the judge...

They don't seem to like Yelp or Yelpers. This is what they have to say about them:

"We want to apologize to the Yelpers. We did not realize that Yelp was created for humanitarian purposes. To help the less fortunate, the ones left behind. All these people with no real friends and tons of personal issues, living a sad and lonely life, unheard and uncared for...the ones sitting on the bench of the world, the invisible ones and the sometimes unfairly unwanted.

Finally, they have Yelp! They can open the site and see Steve with 500 written reviews, wow, one hundred followers, double wow, complaining to the world that his pasta did not came [sic] with garlic bread and have everyone clapping their hands...wow, you go boy! You tell them about that garlic bread.

Steve has no girlfriend, no job, no real friends, no chance...but hey, he has 500 written reviews and an Elite badge from Yelp, that is priceless to him.

Yelpers can rely on word of mouth with real friends? Nope, I think we are pretty safe on that one – they don't have that many real friends…all this time they were a little confused, they thought their followers on Yelp were their real friends. Oh well! Never too late to start making new ones."

As we say at the beginning - we only comment when there's a lesson to be learned. The lesson for businesses who don't want to go down the Bottos route is to actively engage with review management, before it's too late!

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